“Can I trust you?”

Dear People of Earth,

You know – the world is not as bad as it appears.  I honestly believe that there are people in this world who genuinely have hearts of gold.  There are people who are genuine, through and through.  However, we still live in a world where one of the first questions we ask ourselves when we establish relationships is, “Can I trust this person?”. Instead of looking at meeting someone new as a new opportunity – we see it as a potential threat. Depending on the dynamic of a relationship, you may even ask the person directly “can I trust you?” There is a complexity to this question that is often overlooked.  Trust is defined in its verb form as “(to) believe in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of”. Let’s reflect on that for a moment.When we ask someone if we can trust them are we actually asking if we can rely on them to complete a task with a certain amount of reliability, or provide us with the absolute truth on all occasions, or are we asking if they have the strength to provide a necessary platform to give us strength in our moments of weakness or vulnerability?  See, I would venture to say the majority of us view trust as a way to protect ourselves instead of as a way to grow.  You may tell yourself “If I don’t trust this person just yet and they end up hurting me, it will hurt less because I have protected myself by reserving my trust.”  Maybe you fall into the category of people who believe that trust must be earned.   I am not here to tell you either of these are wrong. What I do hope to share with you is a different approach that may significantly expand your horizon:

If you don’t trust people until they “earn it”, you may be waiting forever.  You may miss out on opportunities hidden with those seeking your trust.  Is there a clearly obtainable point in your relationship/life where trust can be earned once reached?  If you don’t trust people with the reservation that they may end up hurting you, you may end up missing out on a world you never knew existed.  What I am going to say next may seem absolutely ridiculous to many of you reading this, but to others it may be the key to unlocking a world of potential in your relationships and life.  Trust people until they give you a reason not to.  

I know, it sounds insane – but stay with me for a moment.  The moment I began to trust the world around me, I took chances in life that I otherwise never would have.  I began to trust myself.  I began to follow my heart without letting the fear of failure stop me.  I began to trust that this world really did have a special place for me.  I refuse to live my life with reservations.  Undoubtedly, I will get hurt.  People in this world will abuse my trust, but others will use my trust me make this world a better place.  Some people will manipulate the trust I have given them, but others will embrace it and build life long relationships with it.  In my eyes it is a no-brainer.  I would rather fail chasing something great than live by riding something average, crippled by the fear of what is around the corner.   It is inevitable that people will hurt you;  No matter how hard you try, you can’t stop it all and that is just life.  But on the contrary, by living your life willing to accept the occasional pain in the pursuit of greatness, you will open yourself up to a world of your wildest dreams.

There are great people in this world.  If you haven’t found them yet, it is because you haven’t been willing to let them into your life in fear that they might be bad.  God hides His most precious gifts in places that will be revealed to us when we need them the most. Don’t miss what He has provided by being closed off to the world. Love without limits, and trust in goodness.

– Tim