Stan I was having a hard time yesterday and I thought of you,
I am on this incredible trip with my family in Italy and it’s truly a blessing from God. I haven’t seen my father walk as good as he is here in months, and he is so happy. I’m writing you this letter because, despite how incredible this trip is, it reminds me of the first operation I went on and you were right there by my side and I am having a hard time. Last night when my family went back to the Vatican, I stayed home and spent some time reflecting out on the balcony. We are staying in this amazing hotel which is much nicer then that truck you and I stayed in on that mountain. Last night I caught myself thinking about the night in our Humvee setting up that comms relay station and the sun was setting.
You told me about a night on your first deployment when you were wondering what your family was doing. You told me that there is only one sun and if you look at it during the right time of day, your family could be looking at the exact same sun despite the many miles between you. It gave me this peace I couldn’t describe. With Kelsey Rose too, as much as I missed her and my family it made me feel closer to them. I missed them like crazy but that simple comment made it so much more bearable.
Well, last night when I was on that balcony, I could see the Vatican from where I was standing. A tear rolled down my face because those years when I was so far away, I looked at the sun in hopes that my family was looking at it as well. Last night was different because despite being thousands of miles from home, my family was with me and I could see the building that they were in just a few miles away from my hotel room. I never thought I would be this far away from home again, and last night was emotional for me seeing the Vatican in the distance and knowing that’s where they were.
You of all people know how much I miss the Army but I know that God has a different plan for me. Last night was tough for me thinking about the memories you and I shared. Reflecting on the days I woke up living my dream and wearing that uniform. You changed the way I see the world. I’m struggling lately and I don’t really know why. Be patient with me bud, for you and I both know you can’t beat someone who wont give up. I may struggle but I know that people rely on me and I will find my way. Despite the hotel being classier than our truck, the view was quite similar (minus the fact the I could see the Vatican with the sunset and not a bunch of sheep). I took a picture for you bud, even though I know you have a better vantage point than me, but I hope you enjoy it. Show Papi and Chris if you don’t mind.
Love you bud,